Cover of When Love Hurts: A Women’s Guide to Understanding Abuse in Relationships

“This is an excellent resource not only for women to use on their own but also for counselors and advocates.”

by Dr. Mary Russell Professor of Social Work, University of British Columbia, Canada

LOVE IS MEANT TO BE SUPPORTIVE

What happens when you are hurt by the one you love? Women have many questions about their relationship and are discouraged by the lack of support and information they receive from family and friends.

We wrote When Love Hurts to answer some questions and help women make sense of their relationship. Some common questions women ask:

Am I experiencing abuse?
Why does my partner hurt me?
Why do I stay?
Will my children be abusive?
Is there something wrong with me?
How do I heal from the abuse?

Maggie’s Story:

I didn’t see myself as an abused woman. The only images I had came from television. I thought of abused women as weak, quiet and less educated – women who were battered and bruised. That wasn’t who I was at all. And my partner certainly didn’t fit my image of an abusive husband. I thought they were wild and out of control – men who drank too much, were brutal and hateful. My partner’s behaviour was confusing. I saw him being kind and pleasant to our friends and family. He was often loving to me, and I loved him. But he got angry so easily; and when he was angry, he was hurtful. Since his hurtful behaviour was always directed at me, I believed I was the cause of the abuse. Maggie.